Why Doesn't a Best Friend Come With My PCS?

Why Doesn't a Best Friend Come With My PCS
Friends make this military life so much better, but sometimes they can be hard to find. (Stock photo)

I have Facebook, Twitter and a Pinterest account. I have Linkedin and Instagram accounts, too. So what critical piece is missing in my social circle? What could a 40-year old mother and wife of a Unites State Marine really be missing?

If you guessed best friend then you should be playing the lotto. Don't get me wrong, I do have a lot of friends, co-workers and acquaintances from the Junior League and other volunteer groups that count on me. On any given day you can find my driving spirit behind any one of the events happening in our community. Heck, I have offered to host more book clubs, socials, teas and get-togethers at my house than I can count on both hands. That begs a person to ask, "Why don't you have a best friend?"

To answer that you must start at the beginning. Like you, I'm a military spouse who recently moved -- this time from southern California to northwest Florida. We have been here for a little more than two years and in this time I have made many acquaintances.

I catch up with these women about once a month or once every several months. So where is the woman who wants to grab a soy chai latte and have a chat early on a Saturday morning? I miss my southern California friends, who were more of the type that want to hit up $1Taco Tuesday, Zumba class on Wednesday, grab a glass of wine after watching a foreign film on Friday and then high-five you after a solid day of volunteering on Saturday. To me, that's what best friends do.

A best friend is more than hushed giggles and knowing what's in your secret closet. A best friend is the one that smiles and complains through every task and adventure. A best friend is the person who listens to your complaints about the work-up schedule, the extended deployment and the fact that the lawnmower won't start. Yet they are also the person who snaps your favorite homecoming photo.

I bring things to friendship too. In fact, I once spent six weeks receiving my Healthy Pregnancy/Healthy Baby certification so that I could help a young woman breathe through the delivery of her first child. I was the one who cut the cord and took the homecoming photo when Dad returned from Iraq or Afghanistan or Japan.

I mean a best friend is not the person who RSVPs to your BUNCO party and then is a no show. And when you call to check on said person, just to be sure that she is alive and her kids are okay, she says, "Eh, I was tired and decided to skip it."

So today I am throwing open the doors in search of my very own best friend. At 40 years old, I will promise to not call us "besties," but I may call us sisters or I may call you my BFF. My new best friend will have only one responsibility and that will be to step in and enhance the greatness of my life -- as I will do for them. Friendships are like gold, when you find that wonderful shiny nugget you hoop and holler with joy.

Angie is a passionate volunteer who has a love for creativity and enjoys spending her time mentoring military spouses. After spending 9 years in southern California she is now a transplanted Marine Corps Spouse living at an Air Force Base in Northwest Florida. She is the mother of two teenagers and is madly in love with her Marine.

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